never date a boy who...

is a yankees fan
has a name rhyming with mine
has a lisp or slur
sees cartoon movies in the theatre w/o a child
wears overalls
is scared of planes
wears black jeans
has a harelip
prefers 'umbrella' drinks
has an earring or any other piercing
misuses 'their', 'they're' and 'there'
wears jesus sandals
played a girl sport or took ballet (unless for football reasons)
is an undertaker
waxes ANY body part
has cauliflower ear
can't drive a standard
has a last name beginning with a-c or u-z
dyes/highlights his hair
sleeps on flannel sheets
doesn't know how to grill
can't tie his own tie
doesn't wear cologne
drives a girl car
has facial hair (besides sideburns)
is a vegetarian
is on steroids
doesn't own a suit
speaks in tongues
doesn't understand point spreads OR has a gambling problem
listens to barbra streisand or celine dion
doesn't watch espn
can't change a flat tire
orders ultra-light beer
doesn't own tools
doesn't know the dif. in a hotel and a motel
is scared of bugs
doesn't believe in God
smacks
eats government cheese
drives a minivan that isn't a work car
wears tapered jeans
has dreadlocks
works in a mine
doesn't eat seafood
doesn't wear a belt
has dirty fingernails
has a girl's name